One Friday afternoon a man who we will call V arrives. The front desk calls up and I tell them to let him upstairs. After twenty minutes, I text him through the hosting app. Apparently, he felt the need to wait for me in the lobby even though the doorman tried to let him up via the elevator. What was more odd was that he arrived with no luggage. He said his friend had their car and the luggage was in there. Reasonable, I didn’t think much of it after that moment.
Now, when people arrive, I greet them, show them the space and where things are at and they are on their own. This guy had other plans. He sat on the sofa and chatted my ear off for three hours. I like five-star reviews so I was accommodating, but finally I couldn’t take the vapid conversation and made up an excuse to leave my own apartment. V is one of those people who needs to tell you how he was a dancer, and now is the “best dance instructor in LA” and how “he has the best dance studio in LA.” Honestly, I don’t care. Even if he was paying me for conversation and not a room, I still wouldn’t care. There was no substance to the conversation.
Now, his travel partner, who may or may not be his boyfriend depending on which of them you ask arrived a little later. Five in the morning to be exact. AirB&B in my place is like coming to a hotel for old people. If you want to party and be out all night, this is not the place for you. I’m sure the second guy, who we will call B, was coked out of his mind. In his two days, here he didn’t go to bed a single time, but sat at the dining room table writing all over a map of the area I provided.
it would be great to say that’s all and they were just a bit odd. But on the second day of the stay, I received a text asking if they could open my wine. The wine I carried home from Italy. the wine which has a note (to myself) to not open until 2022. No, you can’t open the fucking wine! This made me march home asap. They didn’t touch the wine but helped themselves to a bottle of whiskey. To make it more awkward, there were now two random girls in the apartment that B met at a club the night before. Okay, my AirB&B listing is very clear about no extra guests, no parties and two people max. I wanted to be polite so I kept to myself.
Fast forward, these four-people stayed up all night, until I finally lost my shit and threw the two girls and forced them to all go to bed. Much to my surprise when they left the next morning while I was out getting coffee they kept the keys, garage gate opener and helped themselves to a phone charger. I can’t wrap my mind around the why? I guess it seemed like a good way to get revenge for me snapping, but who does that?
Alas, all my visitors since have been great, but I can honestly say, I’m very nervous about accepting reservations from gay couples now. The entitled, party attitude is too much for me to handle.
P.S. They also managed to get me in trouble with the HOA for calling the doorman a racist, he isn’t, and they walked around in the lobby without shoes. Oy vey. If you use AirB&B be sure to read people’s rules.