And you are?

R.B. Winters
R.B. Winters
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When you’re born, you’re parents give you a name and the rest of your life that’s all you get. That’s boring. So I use five names. A few are variations of my real name and the others are just random names I’ve collected. This being a problem never occurred to me until the other night at the Fleetwood Mac concert when at the end my friend was paying me for his ticket and gave a check with no name. Because he didn’t know my name, which is hilarious.

Apparently, some of my friends, who didn’t know me when I first moved to the city and started adopting names, have no idea what I call myself – or what my real name is! this is news to me as I didn’t realize the confusion moved past strangers in the street and at bars. Though it won’t stop me from continuing, in fact, I’m thinking a new name should be welcomed into the fold.

What’s the point of the names? Each name comes with a unique personality. This means you can be anyone you want, in any situation to anyone around. The additional benefit is that when I behave badly, people will write it off on me being an alternate of myself – how great is that?!

If I’ve learned anything from the homeless people in my neighborhood, it’s that you may as well do what you want and get the attention. All I need now is a little cup to start collecting tips.