My favorite moment the other night at dinner was when someone at the table asked me, “Why do you think you’re dead inside?” Without missing a beat, Business replied, “That’s a long story!” It was hilarious and so perfectly timed, though no one laughed. It’s like a little internal darkness is a bad thing.
This leads me into what’s been going on with Lobster as of late. Lobster and I have talked on and off as long as I’ve lived in the city. Through some sort of coincidence we have landed in the same neighborhood. Well, Technically he’s fourteen blocks down and one avenue in the wrong direction. Translation: Too far for me to travel.
Lobster is another nice guy, not sure how I keep running into them. But I know he’s a nice guy so I’ve never agreed to go on a date. I did agree to go on a non-date…though that remains to be seen. See, Lobster reminds me of any numbers of guys that I’ve chewed up and spit out. If he follows formula, he’ll be perfectly nice, try to please me, spend time with me, get to know me and make a personal investment.
Translation: He’ll drive me nuts, get on my nerves, make me feel crowded and pry too deep into my personal business. You’re probably thinking that I’m nuts, I am. Selfish is almost a lifestyle choice at this point, and after clawing your my somewhere closer to the top it seems a poor choice to abandon everything for a relationship. Because what do we know? Relationships tend to ruin everything. Either you get saddled with a kid, end up divorced or you hate each other and live out your days in misery. Sounds awesome.
Time will tell, but I’ll be surprised if we get further than the first or second non-date. That is, if we ever get to the first one.