Cynic or Optimist?

R.B. Winters
R.B. Winters
All, Bullseye, Dating, Larrymore Leave a Comment

WineLarrymore asked me yesterday about the “mystery man” I’ve been seeing. I say seeing and not dating, because it’s too soon to know if this is dating. We also don’t see each other nearly enough to call this dating…in my mind

So, who is the mystery man? For now, we’ll call him Bullseye. We met a little over a month ago and have been seeing each other occasionally during that time. He’s a nice guy, seemingly genuine and I think has an interest. I say seemingly because the cynic in me is always expecting the other shoe to drop when things go well. Can’t help myself. Then again, things are going well, but we don’t really know much about each other. Perhaps ignorance really is bliss.

Bullseye says those little things you want to hear. You know, the things which indicate the other person likes you and that everything is progressing in the right direction. Because most of these things end up coming via text, I grin, no one around to see, and then brush them off either with a comical response or none at all. As with all things, I over analyze. What does it all mean? Maybe something, maybe nothing.

I believe, Bullseye, being from the South endows him with certain manners. That, or he’s the most open and genuine person I’ve met in a long time. Which is why I stand on the line of optimism and cynicism. Trying not to get in my own way, I am cautious to not move too quickly as that blew up in my face the last time [Scruffy]. Being emotionally slutty (available) tends to be a problem and being emotionally distant (a jerk) is also a problem. Where to go from here?

I put this out into the world, if for no other reason than to exercise it from my head. Holding this stuff in will make you crazy.